I've not decided what to do yet.. Well, i guess i should try to go to school, and if it gets too much pain in the ass, i can just walk right home. But i'll give it a try (y) It might be good for me, i mean, i've not left the apartment, since thursday..

My buddies at school might puts me in a better mood..

I don't think i've ever write so much engelish in my whole entire life, like i've done this weekend, and the reason is *text borttagen*

***************************

*text borttagen*

This song,,means so fucking much to me. And it always will! It's just one of those few things that i know for sure.. It's the lyrics that does everything!

I've change. Better or worse, it's not ur decision. I've learned so damn much bout life lately, and i'll take advantage of it! Now i'm just going to live my motherfucking life and just fokus on me. Do what I want, and *text borttagen* I'll never fear death again.

Memento Mori! <3

Yes, today i've found it out. And i'm not surprised..Well, i bit, maybe, but i really believe u. In some ways it's helping me, i can feel u're closeness somehow.. *text borttagen*

Last night was like shit! I'm so fucking tired of pretending..!, but i feel like i have to. Cannot be so fucking slefish.. But now i have change again, just by talking to u. Like i did when i talked to u're sister and brother.. Life's a bitch!

Thing's happen for a reason people might say, but the rason leaked and drift away..

Nightmares have become dreams. No mercy on me. Good morning reality. Will i wake we'll never know. I'm late for my date with destiny. Let me go, u gotta let me go..

I can't find the meaning of life.. I've been looking for so long, but i just don't find it. But i'll keep looking, 'til i find it! But why is it so fucking hard to find my motivation? Life's really a bitch!

So i keep asking  *text borttagen*

what makes me think death's bad? - is it?

why must pain always be involved? - just open ur eyes, and u'll see everything without pain involved is wrong.

can we change it, make it to something good for everyone? - ofcourse we can't

then whats the point if we can't change it? - there's no point

So why should i keep on fighting? If there is no point, and how will i do it?

Can everyone do it? Keep on fighting? Has everyone the strength?

-yes, everyone has!

hmm, maybe, but everyone doesn't know bout it..

-no one does

u gotta pull all the shit out of u

and get that motivation  to not give up.

*text borttagen*<3